It could be worse...

I have three rambunctious kids. Nearly every day I lose it, to some degree, and some days several times an hour. But you know what doesn't help... when I'm trying to vent my frustrations and I am told, 'well, it could be worse'. Really? That is your helpful response? It could be worse?!? I know it could be worse, but hey, right now, I'm thinking it's feeling pretty difficult!

Okay, breathe, and I'm back. I understand that when people say 'it could be worse' they are well intentioned, trying to put my 'little struggles' into perspective... But, you know what, 'it could be worse' is a catch phrase that I say to myself... (It could be worse, at least I don't have to stress about money, health, being a single parent, war, being tortured). I have perspective, I am perspective gal (Sammy, did you pick up that reference?), so it's not perspective I'm looking for when I launch into a tirade about the latest kid related shenanigans (lately, many of these have included Nutella, must hide it better).

Likewise, I am not looking for someone to 'fix' my kids/routine/life. Okay, you have four kids under three, you cook everything from scratch, keep a neat and tidy house and your children are already way ahead in jolly phonics and mathletics? That is wonderful, for you and your family, however, what works for one family, may not work for another, so please, if you see me having a terrible day with my kids, please don't point out everything that you do differently/better, unless you are willing to help. I listen to advice, I really do, but not every technique works across the board. So, if I'm having a vent, it may not be the best opportunity to offer anecdotes of how you do it so much better (I'm not jealous or bitter, I'm just in the market for something else)...

And now, drum roll please, what DO I want when I'm gearing up for a longwinded, extremely descriptive and well articulated vent? I'm so glad you asked... I want you to listen, and agree!!! Yes, my life may be a walk in the park compared to the poor mother living in a war torn country, struggling to feed her eight malnourished children (oh crap, now I feel really guilty), but right now, for me, based on my previous experiences, my life can seem pretty darn hard! Whinging babies do my head in (thanks Anna and Benji), psychotic tantrums for seemingly no reason frustrate me (thanks Alex and Anna), having to constantly censor the way I word questions/instructions etc to avoid a meltdown is mentally draining (thanks Alex) and a general lack of sleep and time alone is draining (thanks, well, all three of you).

So, in order to maintain some grasp of my sanity, I need to have a daily vent, always to my husband, usually to my mum and then if I catch up with other mums, why not? Venting is not the same as complaining about your kids, it's just letting go of the frustrations that build up over the day. I kind of liken it to confession, just rambling off the issues I've had, how I'm (not) coping, and how tomorrow is another day... Venting actually helps me verbalise what the basic issues are and gives me an opportunity to break these down and process ideas of how I could resove them (by the way, when a mother is venting, she is at liberty to offer herself any advice or suggestions).

So, if I ever see you when I've had a hard day (so, like, ever), please; give me that day my daily vent and do not tell me about how it could be worse :)